Another gem from YTMND...


  

This first-in-a-long-time-post brought to you by my childhood love for Punch Out (the first NES game I couldn't put down) and this interview with Tyson director James Toback. Link via YTMND (see also, 3 inches of Tyson)...


  

  

Via mojang.com...

About the game:

Left 4k Dead was made by Markus Persson, for the 2009 Java 4k Competition. The entire game is less than 4kb.

How to play:

Use WASD to move.
Move the mouse to look around.
Press the left mouse button to fire.
To reload, press R.

Yellow powerups restore clips. Red powerups restore health.

Beating a level means the game gets harder, but you get more points for each zombie.

  

Terry has informed me that my collection of Drakkar Noir has reached a critical level. Send me your address if you'd like a free bottle (btw, the pic above is Bob Reilly trying his hardest not to punch himself in the face)...

Ask any of your boys if they use drakkar. you have about 5 bottles of the stuff in the medicine cabinet and you don't use it.

  

Classic Andy & future frontrunner for me to read and/or roll the video tape when the time comes...

Andy Botwin: [to Shane about masturbation] Alright, listen closely. I'm not going to beat around the bush. Ha ha ha. Your little body's changing - it's all good, believe me. Problem now is... every time we jerk the gerkin, we get a lot of unwanted sticky white stuff everywhere, right? Right. So... First order of business - no more socks. They're expensive, gumming up the works plumming-wise. Now you might be thinking to yourself, "But, Uncle Andy, what do I do with all that pearl jam if I can't spew it into Mr. Sock?" Glad you asked... You can have a lovely time tugging the tiger in the shower each morning - that eliminates the need for a goo glove. But, the day is long, masturbation's fun, so unless we want to take 4 or 5 showers every day, we're gonna need some other options. So let's start with the basics. Tissues. Perfectly acceptable backstop for all that Creamy Italian. They can be rough and dry on such soft, sensitive skin and it can stick to your dick head like a fuckin' band-aid - ouch. From there we move on to more lubricated flack-catchers - specificially, bananas. Step one: Peel the banana. Step two: Slip the peel over your Randy Johnson and start pitching. Now for extra credit, warm up the peel in the microwave. Not too hot! Serious yowza. Also, olive oil, moisturizer, honey, spit, butter, hair conditioner, and Vaseline can all be used for lube. In my opinion, the best lube... is lube. So save your allowance and invest in some soon. Alright, moving on - when you tug your Thomas on the toilet - ffft - shoot right into the bowl. In bed - soft t-shirt, perhaps a downy hand towel of your very own that you don't mind tossing after tossing. There's no such thing as polishing the raised scepter of love too much. It reduces stress, it enhances immune function. Also, practice makes perfect. So work on your control now, while you're a solo artist - you'll be playing some long, happy duets in the future. Ok - class dismissed.

[Shane gets up to walk away]

Andy Botwin: Hey!

[tosses Shane a banana]

Andy Botwin: Homework.

  

  

We are JUICED! about this new & exciting partnership with Juice Apparel.



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